Can we just start with I went out, actually went out, to a gig, it’s been very long, long, time. And going to very public busy place can set my anxiety, which then sets off my FND, however determined to go out and have some fun. If you follow my blog you know I was in neuro rehab for my FND this summer, can read about it, just click here. This was one of my goals, get out more to public events that I will enjoy, as my FND has knocked my confidence in various ways. Since rehab there has been change a bit, I actually want to leave the house, but anyway back to the blog, bought tickets for Mabel gig just before I went into rehab, already setting a goal for myself. And yeah here it is, my outfit, keeping my excitement to minimum as too much excitement, yep can set off my FND.
Little did I know Bob Barrett was on my train the actor from Holby City TV show, sitting right behind me, as couldn’t see behind me, wasn’t possible to see. Get this, he gets off the same train station as us, but my partner doesn’t watch the show so the face wasn’t familiar to him, even spoke to him, I was like that’s him, the consultant who wears the flowery, busy shirts, my partner was like oh ok, so missed out saying hi, getting a pic with him, sad face.
Yes that’s pic with thee Neneh Cherry, who’s Mabel’s mum, pure talent running through that family. One day hope to get a pic with Mabel.
Outfit details: Tee from Primark, turban from Ebay, bag from Forever 21, everything else is super old. Wearing my glasses more nowadays, long story short my vision has been more crap (and yes I’ve had eye test this year, another opticians trip might be in order, depends).
This was experience for me, won’t lie was feeling low at the beginning, felt bit like a loser, as wasn’t there with friends like everybody else, I dragged my poor partner to take me, so felt like I was alone in seeing artists I truly like, as well as keeping myself calm, keeping FND at bay, not letting my chronic pains dominate, just live in the moments. As often find myself jealous that don’t have group of friends, I hardly ever see friends if ever, I have this isolated life, and it’s not like I don’t like interacting with people, just don’t get the chance like that. Before my real friends go hey I’m your friend, yes sadly they don’t live near me, or just uber busy, so it’s always via messaging etc. Hopefully that changes for me, as do want to make friends.
So back to the gig, I’m saving the support act for separate post, as that is going to be special one. Here I am feeling crappy about myself, they start playing some tunes, which got me hyped, ready for the artist, little did I know I was jamming with Mabel musicians, backing singers when support act was on, Neneh Cherry was there in and out where we was, forgot to say we was on the balcony next to the stage just above the crowd on the side. There were others too, but couldn’t see, plus it was dark. Then when Mabel was on stage, family friends was on the balcony with us, who knew it turn into VIP, although the security from the start was helpful, friendly, even at the end came over spoke to us, another security guard helped us out. Guess who was singing along, dancing what I could from my wheelchair, yep me, haha with the family friends, made me felt normal, won’t lie bit special too, not invisible, at that moment was carefree, and here is video of Mabel’s single, Finders Keepers (I love this song) Live from Heaven, London 11/10/2017 gig 🙂 my partner recorded it for me, just watching it back makes me smile.
For the official music video click here.
PS The support act was Mahalia, but like I said I’m saving that for another post, so stay peeled for that one.